twenty-seven

I've been terrible about updating my blog. For being unemployed and lacking a sustainable social life I have been quite the busy beaver these days. Fortunately my unemployment will end quite soon. And while my new job is nothing glamorous, I'm probably looking forward to it more than I have any other job I've ever had. Partly because a purposeful day and a sustainable income are appealing, but also because I would rather work in an environment where my contribution of being a pleasant employee, keeping shelves organized, and treating people kindly is immensely more worthwhile than designing for giant corporations with the sole purpose of enticing people to spend more money on absolutely worthless products.

Per my last post, I really feel that I am being challenged more now to grow in my faith than I ever have before. My journey with God has been very dry for the past three years. I would say that during this time I never felt my belief in God wavering, but I can not say that I was in any way challenged. My beliefs were intellectually challenged, but never was I exercising the amount of dependence that I have in the past 6 months. In the past three years I lost that feeling of immediacy in my relationship with God and with seeing His kingdom made known here on earth. Moving to NY has brought a lot necessary things back into focus. I have been exercising faith in a way I never have before. I have always been in control. No matter what I was able to figure a way out to pay for things. It hasn't always been that way here. But each time I step out in faith, no matter how small the matter, God has taken care of it. By no means do I have the faith of a mustard seed, but I am growing and learning that the only thing limiting God is me.

twenty-six

I'm so happy. I have a retail job at Trader Joe's. In my last post I postulated that I would be rejected once again. Earlier in the week I decided that I needed to have a little faith in God and rely on Him to provide for me. By no means has this one exercise in faith made me completely reliant, but it is the surrender of one thing at a time. I've been thinking a lot lately about how to increase one's faith. I have come to the conclusion that it is much like lifting weights. You don't go into the gym expecting to be a body builder in a week. You go in and push yourself to your limit and each week you begin to increase the weight or repetitions, constantly stretching and growing your muscles. At least in my case this is how growing my faith seems to be happening.

Today was a lovely Valentine's Day. My date and I ended up moving on the senior citizen's track (matinee movie, dinner before 6, after dinner dessert, and home by 10) and I totally did not mind. It is so nice to be home at a decent time. Not to mention it was a fantastic date and we had loads of fun.

I'm hoping to visit Alabama/Louisiana some time in May. I would love to see everyone! Melanie, when is graduation? I would like to see you in my visit. I'm pretty sure everyone else will be in Louisiana, but if not let me know. I want to see folks.

I'm off to bed, maybe. The Princess Bride is on TV. Although, it is ridiculous that I would stay up and watch it (seeing as how I own it), I think I might. Only an hour left...

twenty-five

Today I'm applying for a job at Trader Joe's. I am not saying this so that you will think I am above this job, because I most certainly am not. But I write this to tell you that once again, I will be applying and interviewing for a job that will most likely reject me. I wish I could say that I was used to it, but each time I apply/interview I have a small glimmer of hope that I just can't seem to squash. This whole process would be so much easier if I weren't an optimistic person.

Other than that I am sick again. And holy cow it is 18 degrees outside. This is ridiculous. It was in the 40s on Monday. As long as it doesn't get back to the single digits I think I'll be fine. Wow, that was fastest I've ever distracted myself.

I still miss everyone like crazy.